Where Wildflowers Take Root
Poems on Hope, Healing, How We Break, and How We Bloom
Moss, who has seen and supported every version of me.
Ping Pong, for showing me what it means to be loved softly and feel safe
.
Preface
This book was born from a place of deep transformation—a journey from the darkness of an abusive relationship to the unexpected light of love. It’s the messiness of healing. The doubts that linger long after the hurt is gone, and the quiet moments when you wonder if you’ll ever be enough for the kind of love that doesn’t require sacrifice.
Leaving an abusive relationship was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it wasn’t the end of the battle. I didn’t expect the war I’d wage with myself: the fear that I wasn’t lovable, that I was too broken, too scarred, too much of a burden for anyone else to carry.
And then he came into my life with a warm smile and ping pong paddle—quiet, kind, and completely unshakable. No matter how hard I tried to push him away, no matter how many times I warned him that I was difficult to love, he stayed. He didn’t flinch. He wasn’t afraid of the parts of me that I thought were unlovable. Instead, he showed me what love could be—gentle, patient, and safe.
This collection of poems is built from that journey. It’s about learning to trust again, about battling the voices in my head that told me I wasn’t worthy of love. It’s about stumbling into something beautiful when I least expected it, and learning that real love isn’t something you have to fight for—it’s something that shows up and stays, even when you’re convinced it won’t.
Some of these poems are about the doubts I faced. Some are about the friends who convinced me to not give up on myself. Others were written while I was in tears after my first date with Ping Pong, absolutely shaken by how safe I felt. How the 6 hours flew by and I truly didn’t think it was possible to enjoy a man’s company so much after everything I had gone through.
To anyone who’s ever felt like they were too much or not enough, this book is for you. To those who have been bruised by love and are afraid to let it in again, I hope these words remind you that you are deserving of love that doesn’t hurt, of a love that heals.
And to the one who stayed, who was too hard to scare away—thank you for teaching me that I am worthy of love just as I am.
With peace, love, and gratitude,
Devyn.
you have fallen little one your fall broken only by the weeds overgrown through the cracks in my pavement weeds that should have been removed ages ago don’t worry little one I’ve got you you are safe now.
I don’t think I’ve ever been in love
but maybe I wouldn’t know
even if I had
maybe it’s not the fire they talk about
not the lightning strike
or the breathless fall
maybe love is quieter
too soft to see
too gentle to leave a mark
what if love isn’t loud?
what if it’s a whisper I never heard
a hand I never held
because I didn’t know what to reach for?
they say love is unmistakable
but I wonder
what if it passed me by
in the spaces between conversations
in the silence when I wasn’t paying attention
what if I’ve already felt it
but was too stupid to realize it
maybe I’ll never know
what it’s like
if it was ever here at all.
I am sorry that your love scares me but I have been here before wrapping pieces of myself in ribbon and lace gifting them to someone I trusted someone I stupidly believed in I gave him pieces of me for years just to find them fitting perfectly into the endless pile of things he’d broken shards of me are scattered across his room crumbled on his floor just another addition to his vast collection tombs in a graveyard of not enough so now when you reach out to me careful hands and gentle eyes I falter and flinch because I’ve been shattered too many times before and I’m not sure how many more pieces I can afford to lose.
They say your new life will cost you your old one and it wasn't until I was standing in the wreckage of my being surrounded by the ruins of who I used to be that I understood what they meant things were falling apart each piece of my world crumbling into dust the ground beneath me shifting everything I thought I knew slipping away leaving me raw exposed and I fought it clung to the remnants tried to rebuild the walls that were breaking left claw marks on each and every piece of me I needed to lose but was scared to let go of I was left in the silence in the aftermath the dust settling around me as I stood in the darkness wondering if this was it in the quiet stillness of loss I saw it a sliver of light a hint of something beyond the carnage something that felt like hope It was small fragile but it was there.
I’ve only ever been halfway to love never quite making it to the other side it’s always just out of reach but sometimes I feel the wind change like the universe is shifting just enough to make me wonder if love is somewhere on the horizon it’s a quiet longing like a song I can almost hear a song on the tip of my tongue that never fully plays maybe that’s why I keep searching because I’ve seen the edges of it felt the warmth of the doorway but never walked all the way through and maybe just maybe that’s enough for now to wait to wonder to believe that one day love will find its way to me.
I am lovable
not because I endured pain
but because I simply am
and now
I grieve the years
I spent not knowing that.Someday
maybe
I’ll understand
what all the poets write about
what the songs try to capture
but never quite say
someday
love will make sense
not as a word
but as a feeling
that lives beneath my skin
changing the way I see the world
for now
I hold the thought of love
like a whispered dream
something soft and far away
something that isn’t mine
yet.Every person I have ever loved Is carved into my bones some are fractures and scars on my femur that will never quite heal others are whispers on my patella barely-there but heard all the same some of my bones are laden with names that were never mine carved into places that will never know safety But your name I have etched your name the deepest into each of my ribs deep into the bones that protect my lungs my heart so when they find my bones long after we are gone they will see why I stayed despite the fractures and cracks when they find my bones they will see you.
They told me love was sacrifice that to be loved meant to give up pieces of yourself until there was nothing left until you were a hollow shell of who you used to be they told me love was earned it came with conditions that you had to prove you were worthy of it that you had to fight for it hold on with a white knuckled grip and pray but now you stand here telling me that love is not a battlefield that it's not a test I have to pass or a prize I have to win but my hands have long been bloody fighting wars where love was the prize where the only casualties were myself I want to believe love can be easy and soft but I am battered and bruised scarred beyond recognition how can I believe love is meant to be free when all I’ve ever known is sacrifice?
Trust isn't something that comes easy
not after years of building walls
of reinforcing them with steel and stone
of learning that the only safe place
is the one you make for yourself
but you
you sit outside those walls
not demanding to be let in
just waiting
patient
like you've got all the time in the world
it's strange
to see someone so willing to wait
to take their time
when everyone else rushed in
only to leave as quickly as they came
it unnerves me
this quiet and persistent presence
this waiting with open hands
and no expectations
you’re offering me a choice I never knew I had
and maybe
just maybe
I will step outside
maybe just maybe
it’s not too late.I have decided to publish the whole story here, as an alternative to buying an ebook or physical copy. If you’ve enjoyed so far, and you'd like to see the rest of this story, and support my work, please subscribe. If you are interested in a physical copy, you can find Where Wildflowers Take Root online, or send me a message. Also, please feel free to reach out with your story, questions, and leave a comment. I love hearing how my work impacts people, and it would mean the world to me to hear from you.
Thank you for being here 🖤
Devyn.
