Where do I belong?

From The Muse Jar

Where do I belong?

I ask the sky
I ask the river
I ask the trees

and the sky says nothing
and keeps opening

and the river says nothing
but keeps moving

and the trees do nothing
but stay

I have spent so long
mistaking every silence
for an answer
I was not worthy of hearing

so long
calling myself lost
because no one 
with a lantern came
or stayed
or took me with them

I have drawn maps
out of every person
who almost loved me

circled their soft places
named their rivers

slept in the valleys
of their attention

I thought belonging
would feel like being chosen

like someone opening the door
before I had to knock

like a hand on my back
saying
there you are

but I have learned
there are doors that open
only because they know
you will not stay long enough
to ask for a room

and there are people
who can hold you
for a little while
without ever making
a home of you

so I keep searching

because some part of me
is still standing barefoot
at the edge of the woods

waiting for the village
to remember 
the child it left behind

somewhere
there must be a version of me
who does not apologize
for soaking up sunlight

somewhere
there must be a garden
where even the wild things
are allowed to take root.

This post was inspired by a prompt provided in The Muse Jar by Past Marked Prospects.

The Muse Jar is a project where people submit something—a word, memory, smell, anything—and I randomly pick one to write a poem about.

If you would like to learn more about The Muse Jar, you can see the post below.

For Anyone Who Has Ever Wanted to Be Written About

If you would like to become a muse, you can submit here.